I recently tested a 16 year old female for learning disabilities. During the examination, her mother gave her daughter a medication designed to help her with her anxiety (i.e. xanax). The patient was experiencing nervousness and elevated concern about her abilities as she proceeded with the test. I was stunned to see that using a pill for mild anxiety was the immediate choice.
We have been discussing the problem of avoiding anxiety. “Pushing a pill” is a common strategy to alleviate any small amount of anxiety. Again, the evidence-based treatment for individuals with serious anxiety is medication but best if used in conjunction with cognitive-behavior therapy. But, this pushing pill technique (used often for mild anxiety) prevents tolerance building and can have devastating long-term effects – helping to develop a psychological fragility.
Increasing anxiety tolerance involves “Embracing Adversity.” Embracing adversity actually prepares us for the rough times in life like no other. The Best Man at my wedding used to tell me during difficult times, “if it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger.”
My good friend would be surprised to read that recent research actually supports that age-old nugget of wisdom (to a degree). A broad sample of nearly 2000 Americans were asked to indicate how often they had coped with serious difficulties or trauma, including major illness or injury, assault, loss of a loved one, serious financial difficulties, and a natural disaster. Those who had experienced a lot of adversity had poorer outcomes, on average, than people who reported no history of adversity - they were more depressed and anxious, were less satisfied with their lives, and were more likely to have physical or emotional problems that interfered with their ability to work and socialize. The fascinating finding in the research came from looking at people with relatively low lifetime adversity (2-4 serious adverse events or traumas). They reported having better outcomes than people who had NO REPORTED lifetime adversity! They were happier, more satisfied, and better able to cope with life’s daily ups and downs.
What does adversity do for you? It improves your self-efficacy (“I can get through this.”). It provides an opportunity to utilize and build your coping skills. It changes and strengthens your character – from humiliations that can increase humility to improvements in self-discipline. If you listen to others, you'll hear all the time how adversity makes people stop and become more grateful about the people in their life. Adversity can increase love and hope. Adversity can increase emotional intelligence and parents can have a profound long-term influence if they refrain from sheltering their children from adversity.
But, to cover all sides, some psychologists will argue against Nietzsche for the idea that “what doesn’t kill you actually makes you weaker;” click here for an alternative viewpoint.
Does adversity make you stronger?
We have been discussing the problem of avoiding anxiety. “Pushing a pill” is a common strategy to alleviate any small amount of anxiety. Again, the evidence-based treatment for individuals with serious anxiety is medication but best if used in conjunction with cognitive-behavior therapy. But, this pushing pill technique (used often for mild anxiety) prevents tolerance building and can have devastating long-term effects – helping to develop a psychological fragility.
Increasing anxiety tolerance involves “Embracing Adversity.” Embracing adversity actually prepares us for the rough times in life like no other. The Best Man at my wedding used to tell me during difficult times, “if it doesn’t kill you, it will make you stronger.”
My good friend would be surprised to read that recent research actually supports that age-old nugget of wisdom (to a degree). A broad sample of nearly 2000 Americans were asked to indicate how often they had coped with serious difficulties or trauma, including major illness or injury, assault, loss of a loved one, serious financial difficulties, and a natural disaster. Those who had experienced a lot of adversity had poorer outcomes, on average, than people who reported no history of adversity - they were more depressed and anxious, were less satisfied with their lives, and were more likely to have physical or emotional problems that interfered with their ability to work and socialize. The fascinating finding in the research came from looking at people with relatively low lifetime adversity (2-4 serious adverse events or traumas). They reported having better outcomes than people who had NO REPORTED lifetime adversity! They were happier, more satisfied, and better able to cope with life’s daily ups and downs.
What does adversity do for you? It improves your self-efficacy (“I can get through this.”). It provides an opportunity to utilize and build your coping skills. It changes and strengthens your character – from humiliations that can increase humility to improvements in self-discipline. If you listen to others, you'll hear all the time how adversity makes people stop and become more grateful about the people in their life. Adversity can increase love and hope. Adversity can increase emotional intelligence and parents can have a profound long-term influence if they refrain from sheltering their children from adversity.
But, to cover all sides, some psychologists will argue against Nietzsche for the idea that “what doesn’t kill you actually makes you weaker;” click here for an alternative viewpoint.
Does adversity make you stronger?
